This is the final point of separation and as such can fill anyone with mixed emotions. If you have been separated from your partner and the separation has been handled effectively, then the divorce may just be a formality. For others it can happen quickly with all sorts of practical and emotional complications. Without doubt, it can be one of the most stressful experiences ever undertaken and it can affect people in very different ways.

As with separation, there will be many practical and legal considerations and many emotional ones as well.

A divorce can be simple or extremely complicated. If you have been for mediation counselling then hopefully some of the major areas of contention may have been worked out. If not, areas that you cannot agree on may require advice from a solicitor, before the documentation goes to court. The major issues to be agreed upon will be housing, personal effects and mutual assets, maintenance for you and your children and access to the children.

The process of a divorce can seem cold and acrimonious and is recognised as one of the most stressful experiences that one can experience. It is therefore important that you regularly take a view on the situation, not only how it is affecting you, but also your children. You may need to share the enormous emotional burden with a professional counsellor, or it may be that talking with friends can provide all the support you need. Obviously this will depend on a number of factors like how long the divorce takes, how much is at stake and how much can be agreed upon simply without the need of an acrimonious battle.

It is important to try to look positively towards a future for you and your children, rather than dwelling on the past, which may fill you with sorrow, anger, fear and bitterness. You cannot change the past, but you can focus on building a future for you and your children.